I’ve been thinking a lot about the future lately. I’m always baffled by how my life has turned out so far. Sometimes it makes me sad to know that my “life plan” that I made in high school didn’t quite pan out, but really, I shouldn’t complain. I’ve got my family, even though we’ve lost a few people along the way. I have my pup. I have a job. I have a partner. When I was seventeen, I dreamed of being a writer. Maybe I would write for a newspaper or a magazine. Hard news. Investigative pieces. Maybe it would be the lovely lifestyle fluff. Maybe I would be a film critic. I would definitely be married. I would definitely have a kid by now.
I’m mostly okay with who I’ve become. Mostly. But I do find that it’s always fun to dream about other things, too. One of the things that I love about Steven, is that he’s a secret dreamer just like I am. We dream of our future together and I’m realizing that I’m with someone who can help make those dreams tangible. We went on a day trip recently to a town called Cold Spring and we had such an amazing time just walking around and enjoying the sights. We met some nice people, ate delicious food, and admired cozy homes. We plotted our future–the one where we will live in a town like Cold Spring, be a part of a community, source from local farmers, and build with local materials. I know it all sounds so silly, but it made me feel good. Because even if things don’t go as planned (read: when they don’t go as planned), I have someone who I’ll still be able to dream with.
In my seventeen year old head, I thought the ultimate thing would be to live in New York City. Now I can never see that happening. Give me small town life with a dose of the city and I’m good. I want to live in a house that we can grow with. I want enough property to build some kick ass gardens and a studio space where Steven and I can make beautiful things. I want to cook wonderful food. I want to know the people who are growing that food. I want to have some chickens. I’ll draw the line at having a cow, because those majestic creatures are incredibly smelly. I want to have a family. I want my kids to play outside and not ever be afraid to get dirty. I want to know my neighbors. I want to be happy.
It’s easy to get wrapped up in dreams and not take the steps to actually help those dreams come to life. It’s easy to read my blog feed be inspired and frustrated by the projects, recipes, and materials that other people are making. But it’s better to tuck those bits of inspiration away and then sit down to figure out how to make the future happen. I can’t say that Steven and I are in control of our destiny, because I certainly don’t believe that we are, but we can make choices to help lead us in a specific direction. I appreciate the little moments we have now, before everything sets in. Before the wedding. Before we live together. Before kids. I love sketching out our future in my mind and thinking and how we’ll get there.
Those little scraps of ideas pile up as we craft our happy life. I can’t wait.